Jizz in my pants is an insanely popular SNL skit (99 million views I think) about guys wasting seed and the dangers of not getting that seed where it’s supposed to go. Calm Kallahs has an entire forum about the subject. Anyway, when I thought of this I laughed real hard and kept laughing when I wrote it and then thought about how everyone is either going to find it funny or plain old sick – which is fine by me.
Saw you looking at me from across the mechitza
Wonder if we can meet when they start reading the haftorah
I can’t concentrate on this rabbis speech
Then I see you get out of your seat
And then I jizz in my pants
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