I had a nice long chat with an old friend the other day about moving out of New York. He and his wife have spent the last 3 years looking for the perfect community to call home. They visited Dallas, Denver, Atlanta, Baltimore, Cherry Hill and many other frum communities. They looked at the quality of life, schools, jobs and all that other stuff normal people (I look at bike lanes and ease of escape to the mountains) look at when figuring out where to live. In the end, the decided to move to Passaic – I was so let down and my friend then explained to me the sad truth of the frum communities view of those who live outside of the New York metro area.
That anyone who lives out of town is weird.
It goes a little deeper than this, but in a nutshell, my friends wife didn’t want people to consider her weird for moving to an out of town community. In general, I find that much of what goes on in the frum community to be done based on what others think. This is usually the case when it comes to education, hashkafa, shidduchim and community finding. I have also found that frum women are less willing to move away from family and friends.
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